Fibroids & Fraudulent Feminism
Unmasking Obstetric & Gynecological Violence
Anatomy of a Self-Hating Black Woman Part III: While I lay in stirrups at an annual well woman exam, the OBGYN was verbally abusive towards me. She called me a “misogynist” when I mentioned the hypothesized connection between fibroids and chemical hair relaxers. Upon reflection I know she behaved in such a callous and disrespectful manner because she made a sweeping judgement about my level of intelligence based on my gender and skin color…how is a DE&I champion in Fintech and board member of a nonprofit that helps women find gainful employment a misogynist? The violence that was directed towards me that day is evidence of Dr. Francis’s projection.
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Part II: Fibroids & Fraudulent Feminism
Mount Sinai West OBGYN — Outpatient |50 W 77th St 1st Floor, New York, NY 10024
I expressed that many women in my family had suffered from fibroids and that I am concerned about them. I also added that I had heard different theories about what causes fibroids including chemical hair relaxers. I was mid sentence when Dr. Francis interrupted me forcefully declaring that none of the theories are true and raised her voice to me and jolted her head forward in my direction “You do know that you do not have to be a male in order to be a misogynist!”, the physician had suddenly become irate, moved her body rapidly, and then went into a long-winded tirade while I was exposed in stirrups. The tirade consisted of the physician exclaiming that is tired of all the woman bashing that has been occurring since the beginning of the pandemic. Dr. Francis was shouting and stomping her feet while waving medical instruments in the air wildly above her own head that were to be used to collect vaginal cultures. I was so scared and did not understand where all of this was coming from, all I had done was bring up one of my health concerns. Why is she treating me this way? I wanted to leave, but it was like I just froze as she threw her weight around the room.
Dr. Francis was still angry and went on to further exclaim how this is an example of blaming the victim and shouted at me “You are at high risk for fibroids simply because you are Black!” She was cold and harsh in her manner.
I re-emphasized my concern about fibroids despite not having visible symptoms because inwardly I knew what my older cousins had gone through, several of them had lost time conceiving due to fibroids. These smart, beautiful, and educated cousins are now in their 40’s and 50’s with heavy hearts from not having the children they deserved to mother. I remember when they were my age and trying to connect with viable partners, the series of relationship disappointments and eventual miscarriages lacerated them, they had become jaded. I guess I was stupid for trying to be proactive, I was shown that luxury is not available for women with my hue. The physician then said that 50% of Black women have fibroids without any reasoning why this is the case, how to prevent fibroids, or any recommendation for follow up diagnostic ultrasound testing to ensure that I did not have fibroids.
When I raised the concern again, in a mocking tone the physician told me “Well maybe you are the 50% that does not have it.” She also noted that the chemical relaxer theory could be of some value if it prevents women from potentially damaging their hair.
Her behavior and tonality was so shocking and unwarranted that I asked the physician calmly if this was their first-time hearing about the chemical hair relaxer theory as it relates to fibroids and she replied “Yes.” in the same tone that you talk to a child that is misbehaving. It then clicked for me, she thinks I am dumb, beneath her, and unworthy of respect, and probably lying about my sister as well as our travel experiences hence the rapid fire questioning from earlier in the appointment about minute details, such as the length of flights. I then said, “Just so you are aware, this theory is being shared broadly in the stratosphere.”
The physical examination component of the appointment had ended and I thought the height of her mood swings had passed, but I was wrong again. I asked if I should be concerned about my fertility. Dr. Francis stepped forward with one foot, leaning over me and asked curtly “Are you trying to get pregnant?!”. The way she had leaned over me was concerning, her stance was akin to how one would jump into double dutch. In the game of double dutch, to avoid breaking the pattern of the ropes you have to time your forward movement precisely, often you will see little Black girls sway back and forth before they launch forward into the ropes to start jumping. She had rapidly leaned over me and then went backwards as she was speaking to me. She had a nasty attitude and treated me with frigid skepticism.
I returned to “fix it” mode as if I were responsible for regulating someone else’s mood, just as I had been groomed to do my entire life.
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